Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Tuesday doldrums

I don't know if it's actually because it's Tuesday, if it's because (TMI alert, beg pardon!) the hormones are on a down swing, or if it's because it's the middle of a semester so everything seems wildly out of proportion to everything else.  I'm down today, though.  I feel very isolated and alone.  I've done my Health Month stuff for the day, and I've done proper work at work (as well as some not-proper-fic-reading...) and will do more productive things when I get home tonight, but it's a day when I'm just going through the motions.

Cue Buffy: the Vampie Slayer's "Once More With Feeling" soundtrack, please...

I'm not sure what's causing it, but I know I don't like it, and I know it's having an impact on my eating and other healthy behaviors.  I brought a sandwich for lunch today, and instead had some of the pizza provided t the luncheon today.  As well as a Twinkie and a can of Coke.  I parked close to the building instead of out under the trees (though that was as much because I'm wearing three inch heels :P ). I have intentions to do some yoga and some housework when I get home before I do my homework, but whether that sticks or not, I don't know.  The way I'm feeling right now, it won't. I'm so apathetic, it's ridiculous.

I just don't know what to do about it. I would dearly love to just curl up and sleep. Ignore the world. Forget dinner. I just don't want to interact with the world.  As much as I know it's unhealthy, it's what I want to do, and this Tuesday, it's one I'm struggling to fight. :(

1 comment:

  1. You are not the only one, believe me! Just this past Tuesday I caught myself - literally - with my hand in a bag of semi-sweet morsels. They're not even good when they're not in a cookie!

    I think to a certain extent we are self-destructive. Have you ever read "Wake Up, I'm Fat" by Camryn Manheim? If not, you should - it's an enlightening look at a fat girl's self-examination. She actually addresses the fact that some of us (many of us, I think) hide behind our fat. We use it as a shield to keep the rest of the world at bay. It's a damn good read.

    *hug* I know where you are, girl - I'm there, too. We can do this!